Cold Is A Relative Thing......

65 above zero:
Floridians turn on the heat.
People in Vermont plant gardens.

60 above zero:
Californians shiver uncontrollably.
People in Vermont sunbathe.

50 above zero:
Italian & English cars won't start.
People in Vermont drive with the windows down..

40 above zero:
Georgians don coats, thermal underwear, gloves, wool hats.
People in Vermont throw on a flannel shirt.

35 above zero:
New York landlords finally turn up the heat.
People in Vermont have the last cookout before it gets cold.

20 above Zero:
People in Miami all die.
Vermonters close the windows.

ZERO:
Californians fly away to Mexico .
People in Vermont get out their winter coats.

10 below zero:
Hollywood disintegrates.
The Girl Scouts in Vermont are selling cookies door to door.

20 below zero:
Washington DC runs out of hot air.
People in Vermont let the dogs sleep indoors.

30 below zero:
Santa Claus abandons the North Pole.
Vermonters get upset because they can't start the Snow-mobile.

40 below zero :
ALL atomic motion stops ..
People in Vermont start saying...'Cold enough fer ya?'

50 below zero:
Hell freezes over.
Vermont public schools will open 2 hours late